We report. You deride.

Basically, journalists do two things: they report, and they explain. It doesn't matter if you're reading the nightly news for a network, or doing the nightly crop report for Oogalala AM listerners. Report. Explain.

Unless of course you're Steve Scully, president of the White House Correspondents Association, and you don't want to ruffle Presidential feathers. Scully has asked 1970s legend and current D-list celebrity Rich Little to fill the Steven Colbert seat at this year's WHCA dinner, because, well, Heraldblog reports, and tries to explain:

"When I called Rich Little, I said 'I want your brand of humor,'" Scully told E&P. "It is a political audience, here are people who live and eat politics so someone who does George Bush, George Herbert Walker Bush, and Nixon, is someone we wanted."

Scully has said that the choice of Little, who practices a milder former of humor than Colbert, had nothing to do with any controversy surrounding Colbert's performance last year. "Colbert had a couple of zingers toward President Bush, and a couple toward the press corps," Scully recalled. "Stephen Colbert is very sophisticated and if you've not seen his show you may not get it." With Little, he added, "you don't have to explain his humor."

Rich Little isn't the one with some splainin' to do, Mr. Scully. Your job, if you really are a journalist, is to stop fretting about how popular the press is with the public. You're not supposed to be liked, and it's not your job to protect the delicate sensibilities of our Commander in Chief. That's what Laura does.

You and your pals in the popular press have been Bush's enablers for the last six years. If you are trying to shelter poor George Bush, it's because you feel sorry for the wretched state of affairs that you have led us to, with your celebrity culture frame of references and a timidity that borders on treason. I understand that the correspondents dinner is a respite from Washington's adversarial culture, a chance to let your freak flag fly. But the dinner is a reward that you have to earn. You are no more entitled to be chums with the President than I am to be a White House correspondent.

Ditch Little. Bring in Stewart.

We won't make you explain afterwards.

Rush to judgement

From 50 Most Loathsome People in America

30. Rush Limbaugh

Charges: It’s hard to believe this repulsive shit fountain is even human, until you remember that we share 70% of our DNA with pigs. Then again, to be any more hypocritical Rush would actually have to be a member of another species. After the Democrats took congress in November, Limbaugh said he felt "liberated" because "I no longer am going to have to carry the water for people who I don’t think deserve having their water carried," essentially telling his listeners he’d been lying to them all year. The dittoheads didn’t mind; that’s why they listen.

Exhibit A: If someone had taken a shotgun and blown Rush’s head clean off while he was wobbling his bloated body back and forth in an inconceivably cruel mockery of Michael J. Fox, whom he accused of faking his Parkinson’s symptoms for political effect, it would have been the greatest viral video of them all.

Sentence: Parkinson’s disease, of course, triggered by oxycontin abuse.

h/t Josh

Great victory demands great sacrifice

President Bush and Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki have a great deal in common: they both rely on religious zealots for their political lives. At least Maliki is trying to let go of the apron string:

BAGHDAD, Iraq - U.S. and Iraqi forces arrested one of Muqtada al-Sadr's top aides Friday in Baghdad, his office said, as pressure increased on the radical Shiite cleric's militia ahead of a planned security crackdown in the capital.

Al-Sadr said in an interview with an Italian newspaper published Friday that the crackdown had already begun and that 400 of his men had been arrested. La Repubblica also quoted him as saying he fears for his life and stays constantly on the move.

The raid came as Defense Secretary Robert Gates began his second trip to
Iraq in less than a month, arriving in the southern city of Basra to consult with British and other allied commanders.

Sheik Abdul-Hadi al-Darraji, al-Sadr's media director in Baghdad, was captured and his personal guard was killed, according to another senior al-Sadr aide.

"We strongly condemn this cowardly act," said Sheik Abdul-Zahra al-Suweiadi.

The U.S. military said special Iraqi army forces operating with coalition advisers captured a high-level, illegal armed group leader in Baladiyat, an eastern neighborhood near al-Sadr's stronghold. It did not identify the detainee, but said two other suspects were detained by Iraqi forces for further questioning.

Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki has pledged to crack down on Shiite militias as well as Sunni insurgents in a planned security operation. His reluctance to confront the Mahdi Army of al-Sadr, his political backer, has led to the failure of previous efforts to stem sectarian violence in Baghdad.

It's hard work shooting, jailing, and torturing your friends, and at times like this Mr. Malaki can use all the encouragement he can get. So I proposed that President Bush crack down on some of his own extremist supporters. Round up James Dobson and his illiberal posse for a few hours of detention at an ActUp meeting house. Sentence Pat Robertson to 100 hours of community service excavating dinosaur bones in Montana.

The War Against Religious Extremism® demands nothing less.

h/t Blogenlust

Friday Emo blogging

John McCain Googlebomb

Following the 2000 election, I never believed that
John McCain had a shot at his party's nomination, but his staunch support of President Bush's escalation of the Iraq War seals his doom. That and Senator Straight Talk's pandering to James Dobson et. al.

The yolk of tyranny

"Grandpa, what was it like living under the worst President in American History?"

"Well, Sonny, it was a lot like this":

MR. LEHRER: Is there a little bit of a broken egg problem here, Mr. President, that there is instability and there is violence in Iraq - sectarian violence, Iraqis killing other Iraqis, and now the United States helped create the broken egg and now says, okay, Iraqis, it's your problem. You put the egg back together, and if you don't do it quickly and you don't do it well, then we'll get the hell out.

PRESIDENT BUSH: Yeah, you know, that's an interesting question. I don't quite view it as the broken egg; I view it as the cracked egg --

MR. LEHRER: Cracked egg?

PRESIDENT BUSH: -- that - where we still have a chance to move beyond the broken egg. And I thought long and hard about the decision, Jim. Obviously it's a big decision for this theater in the war on terror, and you know, if I didn't believe we could keep the egg from fully cracking, I wouldn't ask 21,000 kids - additional kids to go into Iraq to reinforce those troops that are there.

Honest to God, is there no end to this man embarrassing himself?

Here's a lively little number to get things going

Here's the US Army's 1947 manual on how to execute people. I like this part:

f. Upon pronouncement of the death of the prisoner by the medical officer, the execution party will proceed to the racks from which the rifles were originally obtained, and replace the rifles in the racks at random. The execution party will then be dismissed.

g. The escort, with the band playing a lively air, will return to their parade ground and be dismissed.

These things must be done delicately

Iraqi death squads hanged two more Baathists yesterday, including Saddam's twisted half-brother and former intelligence chief Barzan al-Tikriti. According to an eyewitness account by chief state prosecutor Jafar al-Musawi:

The two had black hoods placed over their heads by the executioner before the noose was looped around their necks.

At the appointed time, the trapdoors to the gallows fell open below both. Al-Bandahung limp and lifeless, al-Musawi told news channel al-Arabiya, but 'Barzan's body fell down' to the ground beneath.

'When an official went over to see what had happened, he saw that Barzan lay on his stomach, headless. The head was still in the black hood.'

Al-Mussawi, who had called for the death sentence for the two men as well as for the former dictator, additionally said he believed God had had a hand in the gruesome turn of events.

C'mon fellows, get it right. There are instructions for this kind of thing:

HANGING

Procedure: Prior to any execution, the gallows area trap door and release mechanisms are inspected for proper operation. The rope, which is of manila hemp of at least 3/4"and not more than 1 1/4"in diameter and approximately 30 feet in length, is soaked and then stretched while drying to eliminate any spring, stiffness, or tendency to coil. The hangman's knot, which is tied pursuant to military regulations, is treated with wax, soap, or clear oil, to ensure that the rope slides smoothly through the knot. The end of the rope which does not contain the noose is tied to a grommet in the ceiling and then is tied off to a metal T-shaped bracket, which takes the force delivered by the offender's drop.

Additionally, prior to an execution, the condemned offender's file is reviewed to determine if there are any unusual characteristics the offender possesses that might warrant deviation from field instructions on hanging. A physical examination and measuring process is conducted to assure almost instant death and a minimum of bruising. If careful measuring and planning is not done, strangulation, obstructed blood flow, or beheading could result. At the appropriate time on execution day, the inmate, in restraints, is escorted to the gallows area and is placed standing over a hinged trap door from which the offender will be dropped. Following the offender's last statement, a hood is placed over the offender's head. Restraints are also applied. If the offender refuses to stand or cannot stand, he is placed on a collapse board. A determination of the proper amount of the drop of the condemned offender through the trap door is calculated using a standard military execution chart for hanging. The "drop" must be based on the prisoner's weight, to deliver 1260 foot_pounds of force to the neck. The noose is then placed snugly around the convict's neck, behind his or her left ear, which will cause the neck to snap. The trap door then opens, and the convict drops. If properly done, death is caused by dislocation of the third and fourth cervical vertebrae, or by asphyxiation. A button mechanically releases the trap door and escorts then move to the lower floor location to assist in the removal of the offender's body.

History: Hanging is the oldest method of execution in the United States, but fell into disfavor in the 20th century after many botched attempts, and was replaced by electrocution as the most common method. There have been only 3 executions by hanging since 1977: Westley Dodd (WA 1993), Charles Campbell (WA 1994), and Billy Bailey (DE 1998).

It always looks so simple in the movies.

War? What do you mean "war"? Quick! Look over there!

Now this is plain pathetic. The Fighting Keyboarders who are propping up the President are desperately trying to divert our attention from the fiasco in Iraq to a comment by Sen. Barbara Boxer at yesterday's Senate hearings.

Boxer was grilling Condi Rice on a legitimate point that can't be made too much: who pays the human price of war?

“Who pays the price? I’m not going to pay a personal price,” Boxer said. “My kids are too old, and my grandchild is too young.” Then, to Rice: “You’re not going to pay a particular price, as I understand it, with an immediate family."

The White House organ, also known as Rupert Murdoch's New York Post, ran this exchange under the screaming headline "Boxer's Low Blow". Rice is the quintessential career gal - unmarried and childless. Boxer, with her strong feminist credentials, was not suggesting that Rice deep six career and find a man post haste. She was making the point that most Americans have been asked to sacrifice very little for a war that supposedly carries so much importance.

But right blogosphere smells blood. Not since Kerry's botched joke have the Fighting Keyboarders had such an opportunity to turn attention away from the worst military blunder in 40 years to a sitting US Senator pointing out that the secretary of state has no children.

A bleach blonde barking loon at Fox News was suddenly overcome with the PC vapors, declaring "That is offensive to somebody who doesn't have children." It's obvious the outrage is manufactured because there is no repeated theme. One reality-challenged blogger at Townhall declared "It was funny to hear Mrs. Boxer care so deeply about the life of a soldier when she cares so little for the lives of the unborn...but if you've chosen not to have a child you really haven't offered anything to society ...if you decide to abort the child, then you're ok.........there's that strange illogical liberal valueless position that they never seem to have to explain."

I'm sure that some lonely little wingnut is calling Boxer homophobic. How rich is that?

Are you ready for a miracle!

President Bush is looking for a miracle. That's all that can save him, and the country now.

Any connection between his rhetoric in tonight's address and reality is purely coincidental. He spoke of a Democratic government of Iraq that needs protection from crazed Jihadists. Maybe on another Earth, in a parallel universe far far away. But not here. Malaki's government is wholly owned by radical Shiites, primarily the Mahdi Army. It's like saying the governor of California is a Crip.

As a born-again, evangelical and dry drunk, George W.Bush is no stranger to miracles. He will he the first to tell you that a miracle drew him to Christ, and sobriety, and the Repubican butt-sniffers who sought him out in 1999 to run against Al Gore. And a miracle will rescue his Presidency, and, oh yes, the country, from the ignomy of two lost wars in 39 years.

But what kind of miracle could reasonably rescue Dear Leader from this mess? I mean, short of a 600-foot Christ returning to Earth to smite the Mahdi Army?

There's a small chance that Saudi Arabia, Syria, Egypt and other Sunni governments could broker a deal to prevent Iraqi sunnis from being exterminated. The Saudi government has already sent a strong signal that it would not allow the Sunnis to be destroyed by Shiites in a civil war. The Sunni governments could come up with a package of incentives to make the radical shiites put down their carving knives in exchange for jobs and oil revenue sharing. The deal could be enforced by magical unicorns and shape shifting jinni.

The other possibility is that Bush's clear and hold strategy of pacifying Baghdad will work. Moderate Iraqis will tolerate having their houses searched without probable cause, and will later be grateful that the US military actions in their neighborhood has decreased the car bombings to only five or ten a week. Maliki will welcome Sunnis into the government who will quickly forgive the Shiite death squads for torturing Sunnis with power tools and dumping their corpses in landfills. That Moqtada Sadr is such a goof!

There was a third facetious miracle but I kind of lost track. Maybe I'll think of it later.

Coming next: Sean's Final Solution!

From Heraldblog's "WTF Is He Thinking?" desk, Sean Hannity is now labelling those he disagrees with as "Enemies of the State". Sean kicks off his little laugh fest with low hanging fruit, tagging Sean Penn with an epitaph first used by Roman despots to disappear their enemies. Book learnin' types (not you, Sean), will pick of the Orwellian overtures.

Hannity is trying to upstage Keith Olbermann's Worst Person in the World awards, which are based on a shared sense of right and wrong. Hannity is arrogating powers only found in the worst totatlitarian states, in order to threaten those he disagrees with.

Prediction: I give Hannity's schtick no more than six weeks before Fox pulls the plug. Not on Hannity, just the reveal.

A note on usage

Attention all bloggers: Pictures are hung, Iraqi dictators are hanged.

We now resume our normally scheduled blogging.

Take Five

The Democratic mandate

Presidential mouthpiece Tony Snow told reporters today that voters weren't that concerned about Iraq when they booted Republicans out of office Nov. 7. The evidence? Exit interviews!

The president believes that — if you take a look at the elections, you can read any number of messages. I mean, when people were asked in exit interviews what was their top concern, Iraq was number four; corruption was number one.

So there you have it. Americans don't think Bush is incompetent. They think his party has been taken over by crooks.

Two thought jumps out at me here. First, is that gobs of voters have connected Republican corruption with the Iraq quagmire. More governmental transparency, honesty, and accountability would have gove a long way in assuring the American victory that Bush so craves, and the voters were led to expect. Second, if corruption tops voters' lists of concerns, as Snow admits, then Congressional Democracts clearly have a mandate to investigate.

Tony Snow should probably just stop talking altogether, although it's probably too late for that.

?itnnudohW

Saddam 2.0

From a TPM reader comes more evidence of President Bush's tone-deaf foreign policy:

I would like to refer to the note about Saddam’s changing image in the Arab world. I have lived in the United Arab Emirates for 8 years. The other night I was taking a little run into Dubai for a bad burrito (for some strange reason the cooks in Dubai do appalling things to Mexican food) and a beer. My taxi driver, Amjed, a Pakistani who has been driving taxi in Sharjah and Dubai for 25 years, was unusually quiet on this trip. Finally, after we got going on the freeway, he asked me, “So, Saddam gone, eh?”

“Yes,” I answered. “He is dead. He was a bad man. But it won’t change the troubles in Iraq.”

“He was bad man,” Amjed agreed. “You see?”

“No. I didn’t see it.”

“I see on television. He was brave.”

“I heard that.”

“He was bad man. In end, he was brave. He was not afraid. In end he was brave man. Was good.”

I couldn’t think of anything to say to that. We drove on in silence. When we got to the bar, I thanked him, tipped him, walked in, and ordered a cold pint of Stella.

What we are seeing here my friends is the power of redemption. Some find it in Christ, others in good deeds. Saddam found his, posthumously, in a camera phone.

Appearing on Meet the Press this morning, Senator Lindsey Graham, (R-Butt Plug), brushed aside criticism of the Saddam snuff film, suggesting that a little "taunting" was called for, given that Hussein was such a brutal fellow. But what would a Christianist like Graham know about redemption?

Disney promotes hate speech

Pass it on.

Chutzpah, Islamist style

"This is a failure of capitalism, of democracy and the freedom of speech."
- Anjem Choudary, a former spokesman for the now banned Al-Muhajiroun organisation. He was complaining after a fellow Islamist was found guilty of calling for the murders of Danes and Americans who practice free speech.

The man who never wasn't

I wrote a while back about Jumil Hussein, and the right wing blogosphere's skepticism that he even existed. Hussein was quote last fall in an AP story about a hideous death squad attack at a Sunni mosque in Baghdad. Now we know that Shiite death squads are torturing and executing Sunnis, and that Iraq's rivers, garbage dumps and sewers have been turned in dead Sunni depositories, to paraphrase a line from one of my favorite movies.* So why is it so hard to believe that six Sunni men were grabbed in a mosque during prayer services and burned alive?

Because the bad news flowing out of Iraq every day is an inconvenience to assorted media whores that make up President Bush's amen choir. Brave Little Michelle Malkin questioned the authenticity of the Sunni immolation, and asked the simple question "Who is this Jumil Hussein character that the UP keeps quoting?" An exhaustive search of Google in English didn't help, thereby proving Malkin's suspicions: Jumil Hussein doesn't exist! He's a sock puppet for AP reporters who hate the United States of America, President Bush, and Jesus. Only two days ago, Malkin reaffirmed her belief that Jalil Hussein does not exist.

But wait, hold the presses. This just in from the AP:

BAGHDAD (AP) -- The Interior Ministry acknowledged Thursday that an Iraqi police officer whose existence had been denied by the Iraqis and the U.S. military is in fact an active member of the force, and said he now faces arrest for speaking to the media.

Ministry spokesman Brig. Abdul-Karim Khalaf, who had previously denied there was any such police employee as Capt. Jamil Hussein, said in an interview that Hussein is an officer assigned to the Khadra police station, as had been reported by The Associated Press.

The captain, whose full name is Jamil Gholaiem Hussein, was sourced for an AP story in late November about the burning and shooting of six people during a sectarian attack at a Sunni mosque.

This nasty bit of reality has sent the right wing bloggers padding into their studies for a shot of Jack and some quiet reflection. Malkin says she's looking for a new way forward, and will seek out Jamil Hussein if she leaves the Green Zone during her embed adventure this summer. Cap'n Ed scrunches his pointy brow and wonders why the Iraqi authorities would want to arrest Jumil if he told the truth to the AP? And my very favorite quote of all comes from Hee Haw reject Confederate Yankee who reckons "As far as the AP's story goes, it does raise some very interesting questions, and I think I'll have a very entertaining weekend trying to make sense of it all." Take your time, Jeb - you've had four years to think about the underlying issues here.

What exactly did the AP do wrong? Jumil Hussein is a Baghdad police captain. He reported acts of violence to a wire reporter, and had been since 2004. The AP identified Mr. Hussein by his full name and job title. But that's not good enough for the Fighting Keyboarders. Mr. Hussein shared bad news, and that's unforgiveable.

What if Mr. Hussein was spreading imaginary success stories? Would Malkin even care?

BAHGDAD (AP) - Sunnis and Shiites joined hands in a human chain around the al Harama neighborhood of Baghdad today as part of a "Coalition Forces Appreciation Day Celebration". Children flew kites and young men competed in pick up softball games, which are becoming increasingly popular in this America-crazy neighborhood.

"Donald Rumsfeld is number one!" said Aisha al Tikriti, a comely teenage girl dressed in a halter top and cut off jeans. Nearby, members of the Mahdi Army, an Islamic service organization, nodded in agreement, then showed off their hip hop moves for a reporter.

Celebrants partied late into the night under the glow of street lights, installed and maintained by American contractors, many of whom danced with jubilant Iraqis.

___________________________________________

* Pulp Fiction

Iraq War for Dummies

So this is where we are now.

George Bush has hailed the verdict in Saddam Hussein's trial as a triumph of justice.

The sentence, death by hanging, was carried out by the Mahdi Army.

The Mahdi Army is a gang of thugs and Islamic fundamentalist nutjobs that control Baghdad.

President Bush wants to insert an additional 30,000 or so American troops into Iraq to do battle with the Mahdi Army.

Nuri-al-Maliki, the Iraqi Prime Minister, needs the Mahdi Army's support. More specifically he's scared to death of Muqtada Sadr, the 13th century whackjob who orchestrates the beheadings, torture and summary executions of Sunnis and women who show too much ankle.

Bush speaks glowingly of Maliki, and has repeatedly expressed his confidence in the man.

Malaki says he wasn't thinking clearly when he took the job, and wants out.

That about covers it.

I can see where this is going

From President Bush's op-ed in yesterday's Opinion Journal:

If democracy fails and the extremists prevail in Iraq, America's enemies will be stronger, more lethal, and emboldened by our defeat. Leaders in both parties understand the stakes in this struggle. We now have the opportunity to build a bipartisan consensus to fight and win the war.

Because you see what has been missing the past four years is a bi-partisan approach to national security. It's always those darned, obstructive Democrats, blocking Dear Leader at every move, and comforting the enemy with talk of Democracy and due process.

Don't fall for it, guys.

Update: Publius catches another Bush lie in the same op-ed, where the Great Decider claims his tax cuts have led to record revenues. Record if you don't adjust for inflation, it turns out. In constant dollar terms, revenues are lower today than they were five years ago. Publius adds:

I've made this point before, but it’s just another example of how the conservative defense of tax cuts — at least the political defense of them — relies on disingenuousness and a presumption of ignorance. If you want to argue for tax cuts on the basis of fairness or efficiency, fine. But the primary defense you hear from elected officials — that tax cuts increase revenue — is just, well, a lie.

Justice for pod people

Who hung the monkey?

The trial and execution Saddam Hussein for crimes against humanity reminds me of a story I heard years ago from a Brit living in the north of England.

The Brit lived in County Durham, and he was having fun with a lad from Hartlepool, also in the north. The story is apocryphal, but instructive. It seems that during the Napoleanic Wars, a French man-of-war floundered and sank in the North Sea. The only survivor was the ship's mascot, a monkey dressed in a smaller sailor's uniform. The hapless primate floated to Hartlepool's beaches, where it was seized by vigilant fishermen.

Now the good people of Hartlepool had never seen a Frenchman, much less had any insight to French culture or language. But they were, above all, loyal to the crown, so they tried the monkey as a spy, found him guilty, and sentence it to hang. "Who hung the monkey?" has become, I'm guessing, a good natured dig at anyone from Hartlepool.

I can't draw any direct lines from this story to the hanging of Saddam without wondering "Who is the monkey?" Is it Saddam, caught up in the frenzy of war? Or are Americans "the monkey", surrounded by captors unschooled in Western ways of justice and order? But one thing is certain: bringing Saddam to justice in the way it happened created more problems than it solved.

In the administration's defense, there probably wasn't a better way for US occupational authorities to have handled Saddam's trial and execution. We have no business being involved, and as long as we are, it's foolish to apply Western standards of decorum and fairness to Iraq's judicial system. We should feel lucky that Saddam wasn't buried inside a pig carcass, or wearing a frilly burka when the trap door fell. That's the difference between the West and Iraq, where memories are as old as the ruins of old Mesopotamia, and reconciliation is another word for suicide pact.

Compare Saddam's trial to Adolph Eichmann's, the Nazi monster brought to justice in 1960 by Israeli Mossad agents. Israel is also a mideast country, albeit one settled by Europeans. Eichmann was arguably more evil than Saddam, but his trial was marked more by its healing qualities than outbursts. The Eichmann Trial, which was televised, helped both Holocaust survivors and a shaken Europe come to terms with the Holocaust. That's no small accomplishment. Iraqis would have benefitted in the same way by keeping Saddam alive long enough to recount more of his crimes, and hopefully bring Sunni, Shia and Kurd closer to a shared understanding of the last 30 years. Should the US have had a role in making that happen? Tough call.

It's easy to talk about foreign policy realism, and the futility of the neo-con approach. But realism carries a rather ugly price - writing off huge swathes of humanity as "too tribal" or "too shame-based" to conform to the modern world. An honest rejection of neo-con bufoonery will also recognize the futility of bringing order and justice to countries like Iraq, and the millions of people stuck there who truly want a better life.

Ideally, bringing freedom and enlightenment to the world would involve modeling good behavior, but without the residue of resentment that comes with military conquest and occupation. Ask the monkey, whoever it is.

Goode intentions

From Rep. Virgile Goode's Op-Ed in today's USA Today (via Kevin Drum):

Let us remember that we were not attacked by a nation on 9/11; we were attacked by extremists who acted in the name of the Islamic religion. I believe that if we do not stop illegal immigration totally, reduce legal immigration and end diversity visas, we are leaving ourselves vulnerable to infiltration by those who want to mold the United States into the image of their religion, rather than working within the Judeo-Christian principles that have made us a beacon for freedom-loving persons around the world.

I know the Democrats have a fair number of nimcompoops in their ranks, but Goode, a Virginia Republican, has raised brainless blather to a new level. Last week, Goode attacked a Democratic congressman for using the Koran during his swearing in ceremony. Nevermind that the Constitution specifically prohibits religious tests for office holders. Nevermind that Congressman are free to use a Bible, Koran, or the phonebook during their swearing in. Goode refused to apologize, then dressed up his bigotry in a Homeland Security jumpsuit, insisting his concern is really about fighting terrorists. Right.

Goode biggest mistake, and he's made so many, is assuming a one-size-fits-all religious ethic for America. Unspecified "others" want to force their religion on Americans, rather submit their will to Goode's religious vision.

Did I mention that Goode is a Repubican?

Extreme unicycling

Monocycle extremeBecause you're never two tired to unicyle.

Sorry.

Heraldblog predictions for 2007

In which your fearless blogger dusts off the crystal ball and peers fearlessly into the future.

Iraq. Bush's urge to surge will not materialize, due to opposition from both parties. Violence in Iraq will continue to escalate, but Dubya will stubbornly refuse to withdraw troops.

Presidential hopefuls. McCain will emerge as the frontrunner at the end of 2007, but threats of a Christianist revolt will force the GOP to reconsider its nominee. Eventually, the party will nominate Jeb Bush as a compromise candidate. John Edwards will emerge as the Democratic favorite by year's end.

Democrats. Bush will attempt to blame Democrats for the deteriorating conditions in Iraq, but the public won't buy it as long as the number of troops in-country remain the same.

Republicans. Major split between centrists and Christianists will erupt in floor fight over immigration. Centrists will win with backing of Democrats, resulting in 25 percent approval rating for Bush, despite the fact Bush also backs centrist approach.

US economy. Iran briefly shuts down oil production in protest against US sabre rattling. Oil hits $5 a gallon, major recession looms. Bush backs down, and looks even weaker and dumber, as if that is even possible.

Best. Protest. Ever.

Those wacky French say non to 2007.

Parodying the French readiness to say "non", the demonstrators in the western city of Nantes waved banners reading: "No to 2007" and "Now is better!"

The marchers called on governments and the UN to stop time's "mad race" and declare a moratorium on the future.

The protest was held in the rain and organisers joked that even the weather was against the New Year.

The tension mounted as the minutes ticked away towards midnight - but the arrival of 2007 did nothing to dampen their enthusiasm.

The protesters began to chant: "No to 2008!"

They vowed to stage a similar protest on 31 December 2007 on the Champs-Elysees avenue in Paris.

Plus c'est la meme chose, plus ça change.

Webb calls Bush a failed President

For Democrats, there's good news and bad news about President Bush's decline and fall.

The good news is, Bush's reign of terror is over. The Republican rubber stampCongress has been replaced by advice and consent, as it should be. The grown ups are back in charge.

The bad news is that the President of the United States is a beaten down, frustrated man without enough political capital to run a hot dog stand. His condition will worsen as his party deserts him, and the war in Iraq spins more and more out of control. And then there's this:

Virginia Sen.-elect Jim Webb said President Bush is a "failed president" who should use his last two years in office to repair America's image abroad by ending the Iraq war through intensive diplomacy.

In an interview Tuesday with the Daily Press, Virginia's newly elected Democratic senator made clear his antipathy toward Bush and his determination to help set a new course in Iraq.

Webb, an early and outspoken critic of the Iraq war, ousted Republican Sen. George Allen last month by a razor-thin margin that tipped control of the U.S. Senate to Democrats. A decorated Vietnam veteran and former Navy secretary, Webb has a 24-year-old son now serving in Iraq as a Marine.

"He's a failed president," Webb said, when asked what he thinks of Bush. "He has two years to try to show some true leadership when it comes to rehabilitating the image of the United States around the world.

"I warned three months before we went into Iraq that we were squandering an historic opportunity to keep almost the entire world with us in the war against international terrorism. And we have failed utterly to do that. It is now up to us - and that hopefully includes the president - to try and remediate the situation in a way that will enhance the stability in the Middle East and rehabilitate our relationship with countries around the world."

It's a compelling narrative, and one that only the dead-enders at Free Republic or NRO's The Corner will dispute.

On a shallow, purely political level, Bush's fall is great news to Democrats. But when regarded from the distance of foreign embassies, or future generations, Bush's disgrace is a disaster, probably greater than that LBJ and Nixon left us 30 years ago when the US bugged out of Vietnam. I'm not suggesting the Dems give Bush one more chance, as the asinine proposal to escalate the number of US troops committed to Iraq. And this is no time for Dems to compromise the lives of our troops just to give the GOP political cover.

But Democrats do need to formulate a plan, if not one for an elusive victory, then one for withdrawal and to manage what is left behind. It's an awful hand the President has dealt the opposition party, but it's even worse for the American people if the Democrats don't come through.

Christmas pageant

My seven-year-old daughter, aka Heraldblogette Number two, performed a Navajo Christmas prayer with her class at tonight's school pageant.



She waves hi to me at the end as she walks off stage.

Let them drink cake

Slaughter, slaughter everywhere, and not a drop to drink. About those treatment plants the Bushies are boasting about - the GAO says 60 percent of their output is lost to contamination, theft, and leakage. But no problem, the Department of Defense is fighting back with language:

"New projects have added capacity to provide access to potable water to approximately 5.2 million Iraqis—an increase of 1 million people since the August 2006 report," the document reports in a somewhat boosterish tone, giving no benchmark to compare those numbers to. The report acknowledges that "direct measurement of water actually delivered to Iraqis is not available."

Don't worry boys, there's always Plan B.

Scorched Earth

Lindsay notes that the AP is sending Brave Little Michelle Malkin to Iraq. Her Royal Dippiness had been hyperventilating about the AP's "immolation story" a while back. You remember it - some Shiite militia invaded a Sunni mosque during prayer services, picked out six men and set them on fire. The Fighting Keyboarders of the Right wouldn't have any of it. Why was the story only sourced to one person, a police chief named Jamil Hussein? Didn't anybody else see this happen?

Now it's idiotic beyond belief that right wing bloggers would expend so much energy debunking a story that mirrors the sectarian violence that has been going on in Iraq for like, oh, I don't know, the last three years. I guess if the murders had taken place in a brand new school, or next to a rebuilt water treatment, the story would have a loud enough ring of truth to snap Malkin and her loony acolytes out of their collective denial. So the loons went into super research mode, and concluded there is no Jamil Hussein in the Baghdad police force. Ah ha! Another Media Drive By® solved!

Unfortunately for Malkin's Militia, a lonely little blogger named Marc Danziger didn't get the memo, and he kept digging, and turned up this little gem: the police chief's name is Jamail Hussein, not Jamil! And he's a real person, and the immolation really did happen!

The AP has invited Brave Little Michelle to Baghdad, so she can see the scorch marks on the mosque floor, talk to grieving relatives about the cruelty of the Sunni militias, then dine with Jamail Hussien on couscous and crow.

Then she will return to the US and do what she does best, namely lie, because you see facts don't mean squat to these people.

Janis Joplin with Big Brother and the Holding Company

It's 39 degrees and partly sunny in Milwaukee. Can't wait for Summertime.



Don Adams, who played Agent Maxwell Smart in the 60s, comes off as a real jerk towards the end. I thought Janis gave a great answer.

Great wagers through history, part I

Jonah Goldberg in Feb., 2005:

"I predict that Iraq won't have a civil war, that it will have a viable constitution, and that a majority of Iraqis and Americans will, in two years time, agree that the war was worth it. I'll bet $1,000 (which I can hardly spare right now). This way neither of us can hide behind clever word play or CV reading. If there's another reasonable wager Cole wants to offer which would measure our judgment, I'm all ears. Money where your mouth is, doc. One caveat: Because I don't think it's right to bet on such serious matters for personal gain, if I win, I'll donate the money to the USO. He can give it to the al Aqsa Martyrs Brigade or whatever his favorite charity is."

Prof. Cole didn't take the bait.

h/t Lawyers Guns and Money

Why I love the internets

Disgraced and still clueless ex-Congressman Tom DeLay has a new blog, and for a short while he was allowing unmoderated comments. Big mistake, Tommy. Over 100 not-so-supportive readers left their thoughts before DeLay put the hammer down. The comments were duly deleted, but not before blogger and national hero James Risser copied them down. Risser runs TomDelayDotCom, the Bizzaro-world version of the Hammer's blog. A Bizzaro blog? Maybe I've invented a new internet word. Cool biz!

Here's some of the richer comments captured by Risser:

What a magnificently, terrifically boring and irrelevant blog. Honestly, who on earth cares what you have to say?

December 10, 2006 | Unregistered Commenter Miles Coverdale

****

You left Congress disgracefully and you want people to take you seriously? You should be in prison you assclown, piss off Tom.

December 10, 2006 | Unregistered Commenter Tom you suck

****

Tom DeLay is a pussy-ass faggot moneygrubber.

December 10, 2006 | Unregistered Commenter Jar Jar

****

Didn't we already stick a fork in your ass and decide you're done?

To paraphrase you: You WERE the Federal Government...now you're a nothing.

The fact that you are trying to keep your name alive by starting a stupid blog is actually kind of pathetic and sad. Please just go away.

December 10, 2006 | Unregistered Commenter Meadows

****

How pathetic you are, Mr. Delay. You are a criminal, and you should be serving time in jail alomg with your buddies Abramhoff and Cunningham.

The damage you have done to this country is reprehinsible.

Do us all a favor and just disappear, you sorry excuse for a person.

December 10, 2006 | Unregistered Commenter cosmo

****

Tom,

When you're locked up, will you smuggle blog posts out in your visitors' rectums?

December 10, 2006 | Unregistered Commenter Rick Derris

I tried to leave a comment to the effect that I hoped the warden would let DeLay blog from his prison cell, but I guess that one cut a little too close to the bone, and the comment was never accepted. Oh well.

Six Brutal Truths About Iraq

General William Odom wants you to know that everything you are hearing about Iraq is wrong.

He's probably right.

Mythologies about the war in Iraq are endangering our republic, our rights, and our responsibilities before the world. The longer we fail to dispel them, the higher price we will pay. The following six truths, while perhaps not self-evident to the American public, are nevertheless conspicuously obvious to much the rest of the world.

Odom is no lightweight. He's a retired lieutenant general, and a Senior Fellow with Hudson Institute and a professor at Yale University. He was Director of the National Security Agency from 1985 to 1988. From 1981 to 1985, he served as Assistant Chief of Staff for Intelligence, the Army's senior intelligence officer. From 1977 to 1981, he was Military Assistant to the President's Assistant for National Security Affairs, Zbigniew Brzezinski.

He's also a foriegn policy realist, and that's what makes his essay brutal. Read the whole thing.

Who ya gonna call? Christian Embassy!

Crooks and liars has a disturbing video from the Christian Embassy. These folks openly prosyletize congressman and house staff, foreign embassy officials and Pentagon brass. These folks need to get a serious grip on what the War on Terror is all about, especially the guy at the end of the video who says "In this time of world wide war on terrorism, what more do we need than Christian people leading us in Christ?"

The video shows four colonels and three generals shilling for CE's blatant political message, a clear violation of Pentagon rules that prohibit uniformed personnel from openly endorsing politicians, products, etc.

How is it possible to fight an enemy that conflates religion and state, if we ourselves make the same mistake?

Heraldblog has the blues

I bought my first blues album in high school, a double album set by Sonny Terry and Brownie McGhee, and I was hooked.

Freedom marching to a different drummer

President Bush, according to Newsweek and other sources, plans to save his legacy with a shiny new slogan: 'The New Way Forward,' his latest plan to salvage the mission in Iraq. Expect to see the new way forward rolled out next week, right after Bush reads all the other other Iraq War reports.

If it's possible for a nation to collectively cringe, then it will happen next week when Bush looks into the camera, resists his frat boy smirk, and tells us one more time that we need to be more scared of al Qaeda that we are of the addle-pated dauphin in the Oval Office. And then he will substitute language for policy, and hope nobody notices.

Of course, that's been the problem during this entire fiasco – the substitution of rhetoric for policy – the belief, even at this late date, that reality can be changed simply by changing the language used to describe it. Bush makes a big show of his religious faith, but what's truly impressive is his incredible faith in the power of PR, and, accordingly, his lack of faith in the American people.

Reality got a big boost last week from the Iraq Study Group report, that 150-page term paper from the adults in President Bush's life. From his vantage point at the children's table, Dubya probably feels like my golden retriever when I give her a bath.

Much ink has been spilled probing Dubya's personality, from his spoiled WASP upbringing, his need to upstage an accomplished father, and his alcohol-fueled co-dependency on others to do the heavy lifting. But not every blue blood turns into a sadistic little prick, and a man Dubya's age should have made peace with the Daddy issues by now. So that leaves John Barleycorn as the most likely culprit for America's impending decline and fall.

So forget "New Way Forward", "Merge Right on Freedom Highway" or whatever Rove comes up with next. If we can't rely on the President to lead us through these awful times, then we'll just have to rely on ourselves. What Americans really need is a 12-step program to free us from from the Neo-Con agenda. Just substitute "George Bush" for "alcohol", and we have our plan.

Step One: We admitted we were powerless over George Bush - that our nation's life had become unmanageable.

Step Two: Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity - constitutional democracy and respect for the rule of law.

Step Three: Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of the Constitution as interpreted by the judicial branch of government over the past 230 years.

Step Four: Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of our leadership.

Step Five: Hold our free press accountable for exposing the exact nature of our leadership's wrongs.

Step Six: Were entirely ready to have Congress investigate and remedy the Bush Administration's defects of character.

Step Seven: Humbly asked Congress to remove Bush from power.

Step Eight: Made a list of all persons Bush has harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

Step Nine: Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

Step Ten: Continued to take personal inventory of whatever party is in power, and when they are wrong, send the bastards packing.

Step Eleven: Sought though science and reason to improve our society, to respect the rights of others, and grant power only to those with the willingness to carry that out.

Step Twelve: Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to neo-conservatives, greed-heads, and other political extremists to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Great magazine covers through history, Part I

The right to keep and arm bears

Is the second amendment an individual or group right? Do individuals have the right to keep and bear arms, or only militias?

The Supreme Court has never addressed the question, although the Bush administration, which has never seen a wedge issue it didn't like, says gun rights belong to individuals. That could change, as a lower court judge in Washington, D.C. recently upheld the district's long-time ban on gun ownership.

"We interpret the Second Amendment in military terms," said Todd Kim, the District's solicitor general, who told the U.S. Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia Circuit that the city would also have had the authority to ban all weapons.

"Show me anybody in the 19th century who interprets the Second Amendment the way you do," Judge Laurence Silberman said. "It doesn't appear until much later, the middle of the 20th century."

Gun mania took off in the US after the Civil War, when millions of veterans returned home with their rifles. Enterprising weapons manufacturers stoked our interest in the shooting sports, and a new industry was born - privately owned handguns and rifles.

The Second Amendment is like the crazy uncle living in the attic. Nobody wants to address the problem, so we just accept the absurdity of a constitional amendment that protects unfettered gun ownership. Courts have chipped away at the right over the years - gone are the rights to own machine guns, sawed off shotguns, shoulder-launched surface-to-air-missles and suitcase nukes. But why? The court won't say. It just seems sensible, and few will argue the point.

The problem, after all, is the second amendment. It was written at a time when state militias were a legitimate impediment to an overreach of power by the federal government. But fast forward 200 years, and there's not much that a well-armed citizenry can do against a modern air-force, and mechanized infantry divisions, unless the feds want to arms us with some serious hardware. Which they don't. It's bad enough the Crips are packing Uzis. How do you feel about flame throwers and grenade launchers?

Monday Hendrix

Because I can.

Fox blocks killer jock. Must mock.

Der Fox Fuhrer Rupert Murdoch wants us to know that he is with us 100 percent! He also thinks giving OJ Simpson a pile of cash to tell us how he nearly decapitated his ex-wife 12 years ago, then stabbed Ronald Goldman to death, was "ill considered".

As a public service to our readers, and a personal favor to Murdoch, Heraldblog would like to flag other "ill-considered projects". Do not, repeat, do not green light the following projects:

Schindler's List bloopers and bleepers

Blind, Retarded Kids Say the Darndest Things!

Bowel Movements With the Stars

Hollywood Gynecologists Tell All

Anything with Paris Hilton

Unearthing Mother Theresa

The Bangkok Club Med AIDS Challenge

Queer Factor

Closed Casket or No Closed Casket

America's Most Wanted - All Muslim Edition

LBW

This guy is a national treasure.

Stigmata sold separately

There was a time when Christmas toys were meant to be fun.

Toys for Tots has decided to accept a toymaker's gift of 4,000 bible-quoting Jesus dolls after all.

The program run by the Marine Corps Reserves had initially decided not to take the 12-inch tall religious figures from a California company because they didn't want to take a chance that the dolls would end up going to someone who might be offended by them.

Bill Grein, vice president of Marine Toys for Tots Foundation, in Quantico, Va., said Toys for Tots doesn't know anything about the religious affiliations of the children who receive its gifts.

"We can't take a chance on sending a talking Jesus doll to a Jewish family or a Muslim family," Grein said Tuesday. "Kids want a gift for the holiday season that is fun."

But a spokesman told CBS4 Wednesday they changed their minds and decided to accept the dolls from the Beverly Hills Teddy Bear Co.. Toys for Tots refused further comment.

According to the company's Web site, the button-activated, bearded Jesus doll recites scripture such as "I tell you the truth, no one can see the kingdom of God unless he is born again" and "Love your neighbor as yourself."

I wonder how he would get along with Muslim Barbie?

Happy Hiroshima Day!

It took three years and 245 days for Franklin Roosevelt and Harry Truman to win World War Two for the US. That's how much time transpired between Pearl Harbor and nuking Nagasaki.

It's been three years and 242 days since President Bush kicked off his little war in Iraq. So comparably, this is the day we drop the bomb on Hiroshima.

It took less time for a mobilized, well-led America to defeat the heavily-industrialized, highly motivated, united fascist Germany and Japan, than for President Bush to defeat a nation of third-world religious zealots armed with artillery shells and timers.

ht: The American Street

Bush's family planning directoropposes family planning

Oy vey!

Keroack, in case you haven't heard, is credited with the Scotch Tape® theory of human sexuality:

New scientific studies also suggest that if a woman has multiple sexual partners, this will lower her levels of oxytocin which in turn will damage her ability to bond. Oxytocin is a neuro-peptide most commonly associated with pregnancy and breast-feeding. It seems to act as a human "superglue," helping a mother bond with her infant. It is also released during sexual arousal and there, too, seems to work as a "superglue." Since estrogen enhances the oxytocin response, females are capable of more intense bonding than males, and are more susceptible to the suffering that accompanies broken bonds.vi According to an article by Drs. John Diggs and Eric Keroack, "People who have misused their sexual faculty and become bonded to multiple persons will diminish the power of oxytocin to maintain a permanent bond with an individual."

In more basic terms, sharing the gift of sex is like putting a piece of tape on another person's arm. The first bond is strong, and it hurts to remove it. Shift the tape to another person's arm and the bond will still work, but it will be easier to remove. Each time this is done, part of each person remains with the tape. Soon it is easy to remove because the residue from the various arms interferes with the tape's ability to stick. The same is true in relationships, where previous sexual experiences interfere with the ability to bond.

Hysterical revisionism

Expect much hand wringing and gnashing of teeth when the Democratic controlled congress blocks President Bush's nomination of extremist judges. "That's not fair!" cries Mitch McConnell:

"We expect from them the same level of cooperation we extended to President Clinton. We decided he'd been elected president, and we were not entitled to deny him all of his judges." Sen. Mitch McConnell (R-Hypocrisy), on the Hugh Hewitt show.

Fact checkin' time:

Rather than openly challenge President Clinton's nominees on the floor, Republicans decided to deny them Senate Judiciary Committee hearings. Between 1996 and 2000, 20 of Bill Clinton's appeals-court nominees were denied hearings, including Elena Kagan, now dean of the Harvard Law School, and many other women and minorities. In 1999, Judiciary Chairman Orrin Hatch refused to hold hearings for almost six months on any of 16 circuit-court and 31 district-court nominations Clinton had sent up. Three appeals-court nominees who did manage to obtain a hearing in Clinton's second term were denied a committee vote, including Allen R. Snyder, a distinguished Washington lawyer, Clinton White House aide, and former Rehnquist law clerk, who drew lavish praise at his hearing -- but never got a committee vote. Some 45 district-court nominees were also denied hearings, and two more were afforded hearings but not a committee vote.

Even votes that did occur were often delayed for months and even years. In late 1999, New Hampshire Republican Bob Smith blocked a vote on 9th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals nominee Richard Paez for months by putting an anonymous hold on the nomination. When Majority Leader Trent Lott could no longer preserve the hold, Smith and 13 other Republicans tried to mount a filibuster against the vote, but cloture was voted and Paez easily confirmed. It had been over four years since his nomination.

Don't these people ever give up?

Memo from Omar

"And let's be on the lookout for any statements from the Iraqi insurgents, who must be thrilled at the prospects of a Dem-controlled Congress." - Fox News memo obtained by Huffington Post.


Wednesday Update

To: All martyrs of Islam in the occupied territories of the land between the rivers

From: Omar

Re: Democratic victory in US elections

Before I lay out our plans for the upcoming year, I just want to give a high five to the freedom fighters who kidnapped 50 Sunni apostates at the Ministry of Higher Education. Let's keep up the momentum! And focus. And don't forget to enter the Sword of Allah raffle for the steak knives and electric hummus grinder. But you have to kidnap to enter!

You've probably all heard the news that Allah has blessed the Democratic Party with a sweep of both houses of the US congress, forcing the infidel George Boosh to his filthy knees. While it is premature to expect any immediate gains from the blessed Day of the Donkey, we can be assured of several successes, including a hike in the minimum wage for our sleeper cell brothers toiling in the infidels' wretched fast food palaces. Hassan al Libbi el Abu Tikrit Luweluweye, aka "Mike", a soldier of Islam currently undercover as a sous chef at the Route 22 Denny's in Peoria, assures us the additional 22,000 dinars he will receive every hour will not dissuade him from his purpose - to kidnap the Marketing Communications Department staff at Bradley University.

And how about that Nancy Pelosi? I'd like to see her on a prayer rug, if you get my drift!

Have to go now. This memo will arrive by courrier in about six to ten weeks.

In Allah the Merciful's name,

Omar

Business as usual?

Is anybody else getting a sinking feeling about Nancy Pelosi?

Yeah, that's what I thought.

It remains unclear who will become chairman of the House Intelligence Committee when the Democrats take control of the U.S. Congress next year.

Media reports last week said that the senior-most Democrat on the panel, Rep. Jane Harman, D-Calif., will not get the top spot owing to personal differences with fellow California Democrat, the Speaker-elect Nancy Pelosi.

But the next most senior Democrat on the committee, Florida Rep. Alcee Hastings, was impeached and stripped of a federal judgeship in 1989 for soliciting a bribe -- despite his earlier acquittal of the same charges in a criminal case.

According to The Washington Post, in 1981 when Hastings discovered the FBI wanted to interview him, he left his hotel without checking out; headed not to the closest airport with the earliest flight, but to a nearby alternative; and engaged in a complex series of calls to his girlfriend, getting her to leave her home to call him from a payphone, then calling her back there from a third number.

"This is not the behavior of an innocent man," wrote Post columnist Ruth Marcus, who covered the impeachment.

If the Democrats blow this, I'm voting Green from now on.

Depends on the definition of "decrease"

More evidence that President Bush's anti-terror strategery isn't working out the way he planned. The number of terrorist groups that want to kill Americans is going up.

[F]our Palestinian armed factions issued a statement calling on mujahideen everywhere to attack American interests, in retaliation for what the Americans have done in Iraq and Palestine. The four groups are the Salahadeen group affiliated with the Popular Resistance Committees; the al-Aqsa Martyrs Brigade; a group named after Ahmad Abu al-Reesh the Sword of Islam; and the Fatah Fighters, Unitary Brigades, or some such name. Al-Quds said the statement comes in response to the US veto of the UN resolution criticising Israel for the Beit Hanoun killings. The statement called on all free people of the world, and all the mujahideen of the Islamic ummah to "satiate the Americans with attacks..." adding that what the Americans have sown with their guns and their airplanes, this is what they should reap. Traditionally, there has been a very strong inclination on the part of the Palestinian resistance to keep their struggle strictly domestic. It is possible that as a result of Beit Hanoun and the US veto, something has snapped.

I'm sure Dear Leader has an excuse.

Happy Birthday Schwesterherz!

Actually, her birthday is tomorrow, but I'm a little light on the posting today.

Freedom marching news

Gunmen disguised as Iraqi security forces kidnap 100 or more scientists in Baghdad.

Shiite and Sunni militias have been targeting academics and scientists, and as a result thousands of highly educated Iraqis have fled the country. Soon Iraq will be a nation of Islamic dittoheads, if it isn't already.

This is your brain. This is your brain in denial.

"Our party does not suffer the affliction of being a boiling mad collection of fringe interests with notions so cockeyed that they ultimately rub each other raw and make average Americans cringe," Barton said. "Republicans will never be that." Rep. Joe Barton (R-Texas), flaming the Democrats, and by extension, the majority of US voters.

"All we're doing in Congress is giving Terri Schiavo an opportunity to come to the federal courts and review what this judge in Florida has been doing, and he's been trying to kill Terri for 4 1/2 years." Former House Majority Leader Tom Delay (R-Hoosegow) in full cringe mode.

Keep talking, Rush

It's been great fun watching Rush Limbaugh dig himself in deeper and deeper, trying to explain why he's been lying to his faithful dittoheads all these years.

A couple days ago, he said "I feel liberated" in regards to Tuesday's thumping, because now he can stop "carrying water" for the Republican Party. Andrew Sullivan, Josh Marshall, and numerous others piled on the comment, asking why Rush had been only pretending to support the President, and mislead his idiotic listeners. So the next day Limbaugh explained what he means by "I feel liberated". Apparently, flowers and chocolates have nothing to do with it:

I said, "I'm tired of carrying the water for people who don't deserve having their water carried," and from that, hell has broken loose. I was lying! I'm abandoning the GOP! I somehow admitted that I'm no longer going to read the White House talking points when I never, ever get the White House talking points. Some twerp on television last night said, "A-ha! See? The White House had this big meeting with conservative talk show hosts. They got in there and they got their marching orders and they went..." I wasn't invited to that! I wasn't invited because they knew I wouldn't go. I don't do group things, number one.

Ignoring the serious image burn of Rush in a "group thing", I'll say that Limbaugh is, has been, and always will be a liar. His entire schtick is a lie. He's a comedian, or more specifically a clown, dressed up as informed comment. That's the worst type of lie, especially so on radio. Steve Colbert comes close to Limbaugh territory, but he works on television so there are enough visual clues to let everyone in on the joke. Plus Colbert is lampooning O'Reilly, Limbaugh, and every other blowhard, left or right, and the cult of persoality that political commentary creates. Limbaugh only skewers himself. It's shared comedy conceipt, where we get to laugh at both the clown and his audience.

God bless you, Rush. Keep talking.

Real journalist dies

Ed Bradley, the long-time 60 Minutes reporter, died today in a New York City hospital from complications of leukemia. He is survived by his wife, Patricia; and other real American journalists including Walter Cronkite, and, uh, that's about it.

Bradley was 65, and the oldest man to have ever worn an ear ring and look damned good at the time.

Dubya's "Plan B"

President Bush must have taken a royal bitch slapping to fire his secretary of defense, one day after the Democrats seized the House and Senate. It was a stunning turnaround from the man who promised only last week that Rummy would be around for another two years.

But as Lance at Americablog says, nothing happens at the White House with Karl Rove's approval. Firing Rumsfeld was Rove's way of knocking the Democrats off the front page. The mainstream media, Rove's other bitch, will now switch from "Americans trust Democrats more" to "Bush charts new course for Iraq".

First off, nothing is done in the Rove-controlled White House except for the most brazen and obvious of political reasons. Rumsfeld resigned today so that his resignation would drive some of the election news off the front pages of the newspapers and so it would be the lead story on the TV news all day.

Second, I doubt that if the Republicans were sure they would be holding onto the Senate come January, Rumsfeld would have resigned now. But with the real possibility that the Democrats will be running the show come 2008, Rumsfeld had to get out of the way fast so that this Senate, this still Republican-controlled Senate, can gear up to quickly confirm his successor with a minimum of actual advise and consent.

And third, no matter how bad the guy leaving the job was, with the Bush Administration one thing’s certain—his successor will be worse.

By this point, the pool of competent, honest, decent people who are willing to go to work for George Bush must have evaporated to the point where if it’s even a puddle, it’s the kind of puddle you find on the hood of your car in the morning after a heavy dew, the thinnest of watery sheens.

And if there are a handful of competent, decent, honest men and women out there who are foolhardy enough to think that they can go into the White House and save George Bush from himself and Dick Cheney and Karl Rove, you can be sure Dick Cheney and Karl Rove know who they are and have them on a list labeled DO NOT APPOINT!

I'm not quite that cynical. Robert Gates is a foreign policy realist who knew from 2002 onward that using military force to bring democracy to an Arab country was a foolish use of American blood and treasure. It's no coincidence that Gates sits on the Baker commission, which is charged with finding an honorable way out of Bush's War. It's Dubya's best fall back position: relying on his dad's pals to get him out of trouble.

Texans think "inside the box"

Houston voters re-elect a dead woman to congress.

Among the House races, Republican Rep. Glenda Dawson, who died in September, appeared on her way to a final win Tuesday, capturing 64 percent of the early vote.

Her name remained on the ballot in suburban Houston despite her death. If Dawson wins—a likely outcome in the conservative Pearland district—Perry will call for a special election to replace her.

Dawson’s campaign was criticized for sending out campaign mailers just before the election touting her record but not mentioning that she had died.

Hey, either that or vote for a Democrat.

Casey licks Santorum

Couldn't resist.

Pennsylvania voters handed the U.S. Senate's No. 3 Republican his first political defeat Tuesday, rejecting conservative stalwart Rick Santorum in favor of Democrat Bob Casey, the mild-mannered son of a former two-term governor.

Santorum, a strong voice for conservatives in Washington, had long been a polarizing figure in Democratic-leaning Pennsylvania. Although admired for his blunt talk, he alienated voters with his harsh partisanship and his positions on an array of issues, from support of the Iraq war to his complaint that in too many households both parents work outside the home.

Casey's victory was based on a statistical analysis of the vote from voter interviews conducted for The Associated Press by Edison Media Research and Mitofsky International.

A disciplined Casey stuck to his I'm-not-Santorum message throughout his campaign, accusing the Republican senator of pursuing a rigid ideology that put him out of step with Pennsylvanians. A former two-term state auditor and now the state treasurer, Casey was seeking to become the first Democrat from Pennsylvania elected to a full term in the U.S. Senate since 1962.

Unable to gain ground on the front-runner, Santorum mounted ever harsher attacks against his Democratic opponent, in the end accusing him of "aiding and abetting terrorism and genocide" through state pension investments.

Santorum raised $25 million and Casey $15 million, making it the most expensive Senate race in Pennsylvania history.

How sweet it is!

Apocalypse watch

Britney Spears files for divorce from what's-his-name.

Dobson blames gay marriage.



Daniel Drezner sees a Republican plot.

Statute of Frauds applies to gays, says Crist

Florida GOP gubernatorial candidate Charlie Crist is for civil unions, such as buying a house on a land contract, or a small business partnerships. Hey, wait, you didn't really think he meant that kind of civil union!

After months of saying he supports civil unions between same-sex couples, Republican gubernatorial candidate Charlie Crist has significantly narrowed the definition of what he means.

Asked Thursday whether his support for civil unions is consistent with his backing for a proposed anti-gay marriage amendment to the Florida Constitution, a campaign spokeswoman said Crist opposes state-approved civil unions.

“Charlie Crist … believes that private individuals may enter contractual relationships with each other; however, he does not support the state extending marital benefits to nontraditional couples,” Crist spokeswoman Erin Isaac said in an e-mail to the Daily Business Review.

So what changed? Crist has been outed! And so, like any good Repubican, he resorts to bigotry. Too bad about Charlie. He's one of the more moderate voices in Florida GOP politics.

Alternative realities

Which of the following statements was not made during yesterday's yesterday's Rush Limbaugh - Tony Snow circle jerk:

Iraqis are more supportive of the war than Americans.

The Democratic party has lost the support of all white voters.

The Saddam Hussein trial was orderly.

Oxy-contin beats crystal meth any day.

I give them three weeks, tops

"What I want you ladies to know is I love my husband Ted Haggard with all my heart. I am committed to him with all my heart." - Gayle Haggard, future Hannidate poster, speaking to 14,000 Republicans last Sunday.

Saddam as symbol

Of course the Bush administration released the Saddam Hussein war crimes verdict two days before the mid-term elections. No surprise there. The Bushies have been bending the Iraq to their own needs since day one. From Mission Accomplished to Last Throes to Bring it On, the Great Decider in Chief has viewed Iraq first as a political cudgel, and then as a place where real people die. And therein lies the reason the US is about to lose its second war in 40 years.

Iraq is really three countries: Shiite, Kurd and Sunni. Shiites are the majority, and a group with good reason to hate Saddam. They are thrilled that the Butcher of Baghdad will one day face the noose. The Kurds are strong, confident, pro-American, and safely tucked away in the north of Iraq. They hate Saddam, and would gladly spring the trap door. The Sunnis are a harder sell, though most will not be grieving when Saddam is sent to that special corner of Muslim hell where the couscous is rancid all the virgins look like Lynn Cheney.

But the timing of the announcement is not going down well in Iraq. Once again, Iraqis are made to dance to Bush's tune. Iraqi blogger Riverbend, who grows more and more dispirited, says

It’s not about the man- presidents come and go, governments come and go. It’s the frustration of feeling like the whole country and every single Iraqi inside and outside of Iraq is at the mercy of American politics. It is the rage of feeling like a mere chess piece to be moved back and forth at will. It is the aggravation of having a government so blind and uncaring about their peoples needs that they don’t even feel like it’s necessary to go through the motions or put up an act. And it's the deaths. The thousands of dead and dying, with Bush sitting there smirking and lying about progress and winning in a country where every single Iraqi outside of the Green Zone is losing.

Once again… The timing of all of this is impeccable- two days before congressional elections. And if you don’t see it, then I’m sorry, you’re stupid. Let’s see how many times Bush milks this as a ‘success’ in his coming speeches.

Winning hearts and minds, let alone the war, is so far from Bush's mind that it is, quite literally, criminal. This was never a war against terror - it was a war for Republican dominance. Look at Riverbend's quote one more time. Replace "Iraqi" with "American". Americans and Iraqis have shared the same fate for the last four years. It's just the Iraqis that have paid the price.

Don't forget to vote.

Pastor Ted and the wild side

Found this posted as a comment on Thought Theatre:

Evangelical/charismatic Christianity lives within the tensions of a gender paradox that can rend people's inner selves assunder. On the social/physical level, homosexuality is condemned. But, taking the cue from old Catholic bridal mysticism, evangelicals are taught to erotically love the "passionate bridegroom-Jesus" who has "fire in his eyes."

To picture oneself as a bride, to enter the "King's chamber" and be "ravished by his love" is the highest spiritual goal in this religion. This all might be good and well for a heterosexual female, but what about males? How does a man imagine himself (herself?) as a bride of Christ? What does it mean when for a male to swoon for Jesus and cry out with anxious desire the words from Song of Solomon: "Oh, that you would kiss me with the kisses of your mouth!"?

It means that although in his social and physical realm the Christian man denounces/renounces homosexuality, in the spiritual realm he has taken on the passive homosexual role in a gay marriage. "He" has become "she," a bride in the bridal chamber. Take the lines from that old Lou Reed song: "...shaved her legs and then he was a she; she says, Hey babe take a walk on the wild side..." Conservative evangelical males would be horrified at such a thought, yet this is EXACTLY what they do spiritually, when they image themselves as brides of Christ.

While human males are off limits in the church, divine males are deliciously enticing; God and angels are imaged as buffed, macho men. They are the rightful objects of spiritual desire and passion. See, for example, the huge scupture titled "Exalter" in the lobby of Ted Haggard's New Life Church. Physically, this angel looks like a weight lifter pumped up on steroids. His arms are raised in exaltation of the the ultimate Super Alpha Male; the exalted (post-resurrection) Christ. Ted Haggard's accuser, Mike Jones, is of similar appearance. He obviously works out quite regularly.

So, that which is forbidden physically is the same thing that entices one spiritually. The same "six-pack" abs and iron pecks that are off limits in the human realm, are the legitmate objects of spiritual desire when one imagines Jesus this way, as the heavenly bridegroom.

Today's evangelical/charismatic male may look fully masculine. He might even have a wife and kids. But when he goes into the "prayer closet," he becomes a she--transgendered into a fawning, cooing bride, seeking bliss in the arms of 'her' "bridegroom-Jesus." When 'she' emerges from the prayer closet, the man becomes a "he" again.

When one goes in and out of this closet so often, for so many years, and eventually the closet door revolves so quickly and efforlessly, is it any wonder that people can become badly disoriented as to their gender? If these allegations prove true, perhaps pastor Ted eventually became confused at times as to which side of the closet door he was on.

There are, of course, different types of love. The love you feel for a child is not the same that you feel for a spouse, for instance. The emotion of love can be considered separately from the physical act. And when the two go together, the act is only incidental to the emotion. Perhaps this is what evangelicals need to discuss, because their fixation on the physical act is really, really creepy,

Brutal

If you can read David Rose's interviews with prominent neo-cons without imagining rats jumping off a sinking ship, it's only because you're from some corner of the world where ships are plagued by hamsters or meerkats. At some point I'll get over my schadenfreude, and start trembling at the realization that the US is facing its worst foreign policy crisis since the Bay of Pigs, or the Cuban Missile Crisis. Until then, I'm in as much denial as the buffoons who brought us to this sorry state. Behold the words of Bush's former speech writer, David Frum:

"I always believed as a speechwriter that if you could persuade the president to commit himself to certain words, he would feel himself committed to the ideas that underlay those words. And the big shock to me has been that although the president said the words, he just did not absorb the ideas. And that is the root of, maybe, everything."

This is one of the kinder comments. Read the whole piece.

Oh no! We've lost Ahnold!

The Terminator says the US needs to set a timetable for leaving Iraq:

In an interview yesterday with a CBS affiliate in San Francisco, Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger (R-CA) said, “I think that we should get out of [Iraq] as quickly as we can.” The governor also called for “a deadline of when we pull the troops out.”

When asked what he thought of Bush’s opposition to a deadline, Schwarzenegger said, “I think that eventually he will have to put a deadline on there. I think the American people will demand it.”

Hasta la vista, GOP!

Rove answers Batergate 2.0

OK, Karl has been silent on the good Reverend Ted so far, but you can bet he's mulling over the Republican response. How to shift the attention away from the lying hypocrite who speaks for "the base", and point the finger back at the Democrats? Solution: call Democrats "gay bashers". Bush himself can't utter the phrase, because it includes the word "gay", the word that dare not speak its name. But the great Republican noise machine will sound like an ACT UP drum circle for the next four days, calling Democrats hypocrites for destroying Haggard's reputation over a legal act. I mean c'mon, it's not like Ted Haggard married the guy!

Batergate 2.0

Hey that's not fair! The Republicans aren't through expressing mock indignation over John Kerry's botched joke, and now a prominent evangelical has been exposed for a three-year long affair with a gay hooker? Oh man, what a buzzkill.

And it's not your run-of-the-mill, snake-handling, bad haircut in a cheap suit we're talking about. This is Pastor Ted Haggard (that's star-5 on Bush's cell phone), arguably the most powerful holy roller in Colorado Springs, and the President of the National Association of Evangelicals. A Colorado TV station has known about Pastor Ted for two months, since the male hooker contacted them with the story. So presumably, the station has more to go on than the word of a himbo.

Please God, let there be DNA evidence.

Pastor Ted was the subject of a lengthy piece (ow, bad choice of words) in Harper's Magazine last spring. Haggard is the founder and senior leader of the New Life Church in Colorado Springs, 14,000 Republican voters strong. Will Pastor Ted's indiscretions keep some of them at home?

I can't wait for Tuesday.

In all honesty, I think we all know how this one will play out. The Republicans will first claim this is a Democratic smear job, with exhibit number one being the timing of the news. Then we'll learn that there's evidence of the affair. Other's may step forward to say they've also kneeled with Pastor Ted. Then Ted will go into seclusion, followed by a tearful confession on the 700 Club. There will be Pastor Ted jokes (got to get to work on those right away), and the Evangelical community will show its indignation with more barking about the great homosexual agenda for America.

Hope I didn't ruin the ending.

Thought Theatre has some fresh thoughts on Haggard, and the issue of faith and politics.

That was, like, so six years ago

The Decider in Chief dropped by the Oxy Moron show today, and said this:

RUSH: Well, you have maintained optimism throughout. Many people, I guess -- in the opposition press, the opposition party -- are incredulous that you are optimistic about the outcome next Tuesday. Why is that? Why are you optimistic? What do you know that they don't?

THE PRESIDENT: First of all, I fully understand that here in Washington people are trying to proclaim the election over with, but I've had that experience before. That's what happened in 2004, and it's what happened in 2002.

He probably doesn't want to talk about 2000.

He also said this:

RUSH: When you go out on the campaign trail or when you're in your private moments, do you think of the consequences of governing with a Democrat majority in either the House or the Senate when it comes to things like tax cuts and the war on terror?

THE PRESIDENT: No, I really don't think about the idea of having a Democrat-led House and Senate because I don't think it's going to happen.

Bush also didn't think the Iraqi insurgency would happen, so he didn't spend much time thinking about that either. That's the cool thing about hearing God's voice - there's no point in planning for the unexpected when the outcome is preordained.

Last throes

Did Iraqi Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki just hand George Bush a reason to "cut and run"?

American soldiers rolled up their barbed-wire barricades and lifted a near siege of the largest Shiite Muslim enclave in Baghdad on Tuesday, heeding the orders of a Shiite-led Iraqi government whose assertion of sovereignty had Shiites celebrating in the streets.

The order by Prime Minister Nouri al-Maliki to lift the week-old blockade of Sadr City was one of the most overt expressions of self-determination by Iraqi leaders in the 3 1/2 -year-old U.S. occupation. It followed two weeks of increasingly pointed exchanges between Iraqi and U.S. officials, as well as a video conference between Maliki and President Bush on Saturday.

The prime minister of Iraq is playing a dangerous game. On one hand, he admits that his country will slide into anarchy 2.0 if US troops leave. On the other hand, he objects to an imposed sense of urgency in quelling the violence that is keeping US troops in his country. Now Maliki is telling US troops they can't set up checkpoints to find a kidnapped US soldier, and US generals acquiesce.

The US military has ceded control to the prime minister of Iraq. Where is the right's outrage? Why is it easier to get worked up over Kerry's botched joke than foreign command of US troops? Malaki is obviously in bed with the same Shiite militias that are killing troops, and all Limbaugh can talk about is Michael J. Fox?